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Given the complex nature of the task, it’s essential for both
the parent and child to have a clear understanding of what
an executorship entails and to plan ahead for those duties. At
some point, you’ll likely find yourself in a position to advise
members of both generations on this important decision.
What Does an Executor Do?
In addition to distributing the assets of the deceased parent,
the executor has a number of other responsibilities, including
paying debts and final expenses, filing taxes, protecting
assets, paying bills, and ordering death certificates. He or
she is a fiduciary and can be held to that standard by the
estate beneficiaries. Staying organized and diligent is critical,
especially if family relationships are tenuous.
Who’s the Best Person for the Job?
Both the parent and child should ask themselves this question.
Family dynamics can play a large role in executorship
decisions, and clients may act out of a sense of obligation
rather than in their own best interests. For instance, to avoid
hurt feelings, many parents are inclined to name multiple
children as co-executors. Although this may be appropriate
in some situations, it can easily result in confusion, delays,
and cumbersome legal requirements. Meanwhile, a child
may feel duty-bound to accept the role of executor, even
if he or she isn’t equipped to carry out the responsibilities.
The best way to approach the matter is through a candid
family conversation. When my mother was updating her
will, she set up a time with me and my brother to go over
the provisions, explain her wishes, note the locations of
important documents—and tell us that she intended to
name me as executor. At first, my brother was hurt and
questioned why he wasn’t included as co-executor. We had
a frank discussion about the process and the time-consuming
aspects of the job. In the end, he understood that my
background in financial planning made me the better
candidate for the task, and he was actually thankful that
so much thought had gone into the decision.
Where Is Everything?
One of the executor’s main duties is carrying out Mom’s or
Dad’s final instructions for distributing property, according
to the will. Upon accepting the job, he or she should talk
with the parent about the location of the will and discuss
the need to keep important documents in a safe place.
Storing documents in a centralized location may prevent
confusion later, especially if the parent is suffering from
cognitive issues. Safe deposit boxes to which the executor
has access are commonly used for keeping wills, life insurance
policies, and the like. (If the executor cannot locate the will,
it may be worthwhile to check with the parent’s attorney.)
Over the course of a lifetime, people can accumulate a lot
of stuff—from personal possessions like jewelry and furniture
to bank accounts, real estate, royalties, deeds, and so on.
If the estate is large, the family should periodically take
an inventory of assets. Without an updated inventory, the
executor will need to identify all of the assets upon the
Naming an Executor: First Steps for Parents and Adult Children
JUSTIN C. DUFT, CFP®, MSFS, CLU®, CHFC®, CLTC
It’s common for spouses to name each other as executor of their wills. Considering
the spouse is likely the person most familiar with the decedent’s finances, it makes
a lot of sense. But the surviving spouse then needs to name a new executor, and
that responsibility often falls to an adult child.
